Category Archives: Married w/ Middle Children

Sexuality: Masterpiece or Minefield?

Actually, its BOTH. God created everyone of us with sexuality and that sexuality is imprinted on our soul. Our sexuality shows up in anatomy, hormones, attractions, needs and desires. Our sexuality is powerful; sometimes overwhelmingly so. In fact, it is so powerful that the only context strong enough to truly handle it is the covenant relationship God called marriage. But when we use our sexuality outside of that relationship, the consequences are unpredictable and become a minefield.

Sexuality

Artists like Michelangelo spent years working on sculptures that use anatomy as part of their story. The world famous Mona Lisa involves anatomy too – but it her case it’s her eyes and her mysterious smile. Eye contact can be VERY powerful and sexuality is not limited to private parts. It springs forth from our eyes, our facial expressions, neck, lips, neck, arm, tongue, hands, fingertips, shoulders, legs… you name it. Our sexuality is aroused in many ways: sight, smell, touch, taste, sounds and situations; even unconscious dreams. It really is staggering that God created all of this – knowing full well it would create endless opportunities for sin. The ache for acceptance is relentless…

There is no escaping it

This topic affects everyone on a very personal level and virtually no one is talking about it inside the church! People have deep stuff going on in this area and churches are not inherently equipped to handle it. It takes intentionality. It also takes courage to take the topic of sexuality on because people back away from it like the plague – its a conversation stopper. That is until until someone courageously (or desperately) opens up and opens the door. Then, the floodgates open. There is so much pain lurking just below the surface. We have got to figure out a way to deal with it.

Reclaiming Sexuality (or at least what fighting for what God intended Sexuality to be)

My wife and I attended a leadership training event recently where we heard raw and transparent testimony from the people below about their journey of brokenness and Reclaiming Sexuality. We were reminded that sexuality is something beautiful; created by God to give us a tangible way to understand the concept of His covenant love. I now have Hope for a better conversation inside the church regarding sex and sexuality. I have this hope because I met some people who were willing to get gut-level honest about the nitty gritty realities of life in this area. They have lived it and are STILL living it. There was no sugar-coating the challenges. Being a Christian does not make you immune. In fact, it probably puts a target on your back – but we can get into that later.

Here are the groups we heard from:

Anne Kerr – https://truenorthfp.org
Julie Slattery – https://www.authenticintimacy.com/
Jonathan Daugherty – http://www.jonathandaugherty.com/

Each has their own personal story of struggle and victory. Each has their own unique perspective. All have a unifying testimony of God’s faithfulness as they sought to look at their circumstances biblically and respond in a spiritually heroic fashion.

Here is an example: In this video Juli Slattery talks about the beauty of Sexuality and how it is a Powerful “Holy” Metaphor.